Doctor Who: The Re-imagining - fan-fiction script

When Matt Smith announced he was leaving Doctor Who, a feature I had written which asked the question ‘Is it time for a female Doctor Who?’ went viral – perhaps unsurprisingly. Many were appalled at the mere suggestion and I actually managed to get a second feature written based solely on the vitriolic comments the first article sparked.

Yet throughout all of this hatred, one pairing stuck in my mind. As I contemplated which actress (or actor – yes I was thinking of both!) might work really well as the new Doctor, Olivia Colman popped into my head and just wouldn’t leave.

Having seen her in Tyrannosaur I knew she could do drama; she could break your heart. And everyone knew already just how funny she was from her earlier TV work and films like Hot Fuzz. She seemed the perfect choice.

A female Doctor required a male companion in my mind too and it occurred to me that the loveable Rupert Grint (Ron Weasley to Harry Potter fans) might just be brilliant. He could be endearing, angry, feisty, stroppy - all the great marks of an interesting companion.

The pairing stuck with me, even after Peter Capaldi was announced as the replacement.

And so, I give you Doctor Who: The Re-imagining, a fun little script I wrote in which the Doctor (Olivia Colman) and her new assistant (Rupert Grint) go on their first adventure. I hope you like it!

Please take it in the context it was meant – a laugh!

Safe travels, Whovians xxx

Driving Lessons

I will admit to getting this out simply because it had Rupert Grint in it with his Harry Potter mum Julie Walters. I was pleasantly surprised to see it's actually a very good film! With a supporting cast including Laura Linney (with British accent), Nicholas Farrell and Tamsin Egerton, Driving Lessons is the story of 17 year old Ben (played by Grint) as he struggles to balance a bizarre homelife with a new summer job as assistant to retired actress Evie (Walters). He has just failed his driving test and mum Laura (Linney) insists on teaching him herself. He is also a tortured poet of sorts and the girl he likes thinks he's a little odd to say the least.

The family are strictly Christian (the dad is a priest) and every other line is about Jesus and God which is a little jarring when you learn that the mother is - by any stretch of the imagination - a total bitch! Of course, goody-two-shoes Ben is a little taken aback by the foul-mouthed Evie but the two soon become unlikely friends and go on adventures together.

It's a heart-warming tale about growing up and becoming your own person, done with sensitivity and bucket loads of humour. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. Favourite line has to go to Grint after his first time with a lovely Scottish lady as he leaves saying "Thanks for having me". I was close to tears I was laughing so hard.

I will say that for a die hard Harry Potter fan, the opening twenty minutes or so were a little weird given that I am used to seeing these two leads as mother and son but all is soon forgotten as you fall into the plot and get taken along for the ride.

A lovely and very funny heart-warming tale of friendship and trusting in who you are.

4/5 FOBLES

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2: Book vs Film

SPOILER ALERT please only read this if you have read the book and know the plot (or don't mind being told it!).

OK firstly I am stunned that JK Rowling actually put her name to this one with a producer credit. It's quite possibly the worst book to film conversion of the entire series. I was delighted when they decided to make it into two films as there simply is just too much in book 7 to cram into one film. There's no way they could have done it justice. And Part 1 really did well in setting the scene for Part 2. It had a much slower pace but so does the book and it's all necessary in the build up to the big dramatic finale. It's such a shame then that the finale had very little drama.

All the best bits from the book are dropped, changed or trivialised. The deaths of important characters are brushed over so quickly you barely have time to be upset for them before moving on to the next scene. Personal favourites for me - and no doubt many other fans of the books - were Mamma Weasley getting her girl on girl fight on with Bellatrix (something that in the film had no build-up to and was over in a heartbeat) and THE kiss. I hasten to add it wasn't the romance that I loved of that particular kiss but the brilliantly funny dialogue that accompanied it. Harry is there with them, Ron is worried about the elves and the two boys fight over whether now is the most opportune moment to be having a quick snog. BRILLIANT! In the film, it's a quick kiss on their own and on ya go with the fight please, thanks. Even the epilogue failed to mention Neville or even include little Lupin so brilliantly mirrored in the book by the youthful Harry. Most of the very short section was totally dropped and turned into schmaltzy nostalgia.

Altfg

Of course there are great bits too. Hermione as Bellatrix was actually very funny, especially when she says good morning to somebody in her normal voice. Also, the spectacle of it all is amazing. One part in particular sees the three running through the chaos and being met at every turn by some kind of enemy. The battle sequences are all about brilliant effects, wands at the ready. But in that lies the biggest problem of the film - they have gone with spectacle over plot. Those who haven't read the book would be totally lost I'm sure as none of it really gets explained. And for those who have read the book it is a mystery why, when such massive chunks of plot are left out, they have added so much that never existed to begin with. There is a whole new fight sequence between Voldermort and Harry that lasts ages and the whole section where Ron and Hermione disappear off to destroy the horcrux in the chamber of secrets is expanded.

What the makers of this film seem to have not realised is that the spectacle is only as good as the characters taking part. If you aren't allowed time to care then the fights just don't matter and you may as well be watching Transformers. People have grown up with these characters and seen them grow and they needed a proper and fitting send off.

The famous "I open at the close" scene is incredibly moving but rather lacking of company (weren't there loads of people in the book?) Radcliffe manages to pull that whole section off really well, I thought, given the severity of it all.

Also, for younger fans there is one particular death that was so nasty it had me cringing and looking away and I don't normally scare that easy. Man I hate that snake.

Showbiz Junkies

The one thing I can't decide is whether I would have enjoyed it more if i hadn't read the book. I really couldn't tell you. You can't unknow something and look at it that impartially. So would I see it again? Well yes actually I already have tickets to see it on Friday - perhaps it will be better in 3D? And fans of the book will of course want to see it regardless just to see more of their beloved characters on the big screen. Would I rush - hell no. Wait till it's Orange wednesday and you might feel a little less cheated.

2.5/5 FOBLES

If you're as much of a fan of the books as I am check out my blog on why they are perfect literature here. LE xx