Ultimate DVD shelf

A few days ago I did a post about the Ultimate bookshelf - the kind of books that you just can't part with, the ones that need to be on your shelf for the days (possibly many years from now) when you know you will need to read it again. But in the interest of fairness here at film vs book - I should really do an ultimate DVD shelf too. These are the DVDs that once again - need to be owned and ready to be seen at a moment's notice.

As I started to consider mine, I realised that most are classics, musicals or Disney. These are the types of films that are not normally on TV and sometimes you are just in the mood to watch one - this is when having them in your DVD vault is essential.

Here are my top 10:

1. It's a Wonderful Life - comes out every Christmas, Jimmy Stewart at his finest, heart-wearming and cheesy but oh so brilliantly dark too. "Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me .... I burped." Brilliant.
2. Fiddler on the Roof - very rarely on TV but a must if you grew up in my house. 
3. Singing in the Rain - arguably the finest musical ever made for the big screen. Incredible dance sequences, amazing colour and oh so funny.
4. The Lion King - the best Disney ever made, never gets old. Amazing score, amazing story, amazing characters. Perfect Disney fun.
5. Back to the Future trilogy (yes I'm cheating and going for a box set!)
6. Top Secret - so secret, many haven't heard of it. Never on TV and so so funny. A DVD must-have.
7. Monty Python film collection - Life of Brian, Holy Grail. Sometimes you just need some python humour!
8. Pedro Almódovar box set - sometimes you just need to go Spanish, dark and brilliant - and who better than Pedro to take you there.
9. Love Actually - not the greatest film I've ever seen but a brilliant romcom with arguably the funniest audio commentary I have ever heard. Hugh Grant, Bill Nighy and co all chat about the film and are so funny that they become more interesting than the film itself!
10. Stand by Me - the ultimate coming-of-age film with an incredible foursome of young stars back in the day. Deals with some serious issues (this is based on a Stephen King book after all!) but has some of the funniest, silliest insults and one-liners ever uttered on screen.

Others that came close but didn't quite make the cut are Flight of the Navigator, Empire Records, The Goonies (video commentary with the cast all grown up!) a great disaster movie - either Independence Day or The Day After Tomorrow and Soapdish.

So what DVDs would be in your collection?

The Ultimate Bookshelf

Some books are a good read, some are a great read and others, no matter how much you love them, are books you will only ever read once - and most likely will pass on to others.  Then there are the books that you cannot part with, the rare books that must remain in your position until the end of time just for that day you feel the need to read them again. Or perhaps you just want to compile an impressive collection of works of literary genius to impress your friends and visitors :)

Mine would be a compilation of classics, the perspective-altering must reads, a couple of more recent books I consider to be perfect literature and ones I would want to pass on to future children because they are great adventures and inspire the use of imagination. In no particular order - here are my Top 10. (Though I'm sure I've forgotten something of vital importance).

1. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
2. The Harry Potter collection by JK Rowling
3. The Roald Dahl collection
4. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time by Mark Haddon
5. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
6. Bag of Bones by Stephen King
7. Sister by Rosamund Lupton
8. Little Women by Louisa M. Alcott 
9. The complete works of William Shakespeare
10. The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas by John Boyne

So what books would you have on your ultimate bookshelf? And how long would they sit there before you picked them up and read them again?

Top 10 film insults

Ever watch a film and wish you had the courage to insult the way they do? It always seems more poetic and witty or just hilariously vulgar. Here are ten to make you wince ... or laugh, depending on your mood:

10. Sex and the City
I curse the day you were born.

Charlotte plots what she would say if she saw Mr Big again after what he did to best friend Carrie. Then, while heavily pregnant and eating alone, she gets her chance. It would have had a lot more clout if she didn't then go into labour and need his help to get to the hospital. Funny.

9. Scary Movie
Shorty: Yo mother!
Brenda: You my brother, that's your mother too, jackass.
Shorty: Oh yeah..well, then your father's stupid! Ha ha ha.
Brenda: So? I don't know him.

Possibly the best comeback to a "yo mother" insult ever uttered.

8. Anchorman
You are a smelly pirate hooker. Why don't you go back to your home on whore island?

Up there with the best of them, Anchorman has some of the greatest one-liners ever uttered in cinema. This is just one of the many insults Ron Burgundy throws at his co-anchor Veronica Corningstone.

7. Saving Private Ryan
I mean, picture a girl who just took a nosedive from the ugly tree and hit every branch coming down.

Matt Damon really knows how to paint a picture when he tells a story.

6. Much Ado About Nothing
Scratching could not make it worse, an 'twere such a face as yours were.

If you want insults that pack a wordy punch, you can't beat a bit of Shakespeare for pure class.

5. Clueless
You're a virgin who can't drive.

Brittany Murphy keeping it to the point.

4. Parenthood
Well, I thought someone in this house ought to be having sex - I mean with something that doesn't require batteries.

Has there ever been a meaner insult to someone's mum on screen? She follows it up saying that she should go before she says anything she'll regret... it gets worse?

3. A Fish Called Wanda
You pompous stuck up snot nosed English giant twirp scum bag f**k face dickhead asshole.

Kevin Kline plays the stereotypical arrogant American perfectly.

2. Battle Royale
You ugly shrimpy nit!

This one may have lost something in translation but it remains one of the funniest insults I've ever heard as our heroine is hiding from the school bullies in the toilet and gets this classic thrown at her.

1. Monty Python's The Holy Grail
I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries.

Has there ever been a funnier, more bizarre insult than this? The french taunting scene is one of the funniest scenes in cinema history and goes on and on and on...